How important should your parents option be on the people you have relationships with?

I was recently engaged to to someone that my parents practically hated and pressured me the whole time that I was with them.





My parents have wanted me to marry the same person since the 4th grade, so now that the other relationship is over they want me to try with to be with the person they chose.





How important should what they want be? They raised me, fed me, clothed me....IDK what to think.How important should your parents option be on the people you have relationships with?
People who live their lives to suit others, are rarely happy. I love my mother dearly, and I will always be thankful for my upbringing and that I never lacked for anything that I needed...however, that doesn't give her the right to dictate my actions/choices in my adult life.





You do not owe your parents anything just because they fed and clothed you. They chose to have children, and thus accepted that responsibility. You are an adult and have the right to live your life as you see fit. If they don't like it, that's their problem. You will never be happy making your decisions to suit them and not yourself.





My lover is black (I'm white). It would kill my mother to know this. However, if our relationship moves into something more serious I will tell her...and no matter how she reacts, I will not change my feelings toward him or leave him because she is unhappy with it (assuming she would be). I would let her know I love her, appreciate her, and hope she can be happy for me but that my life is mine to live and I'm going to live it as I see fit.





I hope you do what makes YOU happy...if you aren't interested in 4th grade girl, then tell your parents that. If they push it, ignore the issue and refuse to discuss it with them. Say ';this is how I feel and I'd appreciate you allowing me to live my life as I see fit';.





Good luck!